The Truth About Threesomes

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So you and your man want to have a threesome. You’ve talked about it, fantasized about it during lovemaking and now you think you’re ready to explore and experiment with another woman in your bed. Now if you could just find that “special” woman who is willing to jump in the sack with not just one stranger, but two – you and your man.

The idea of being used as a live, human dildo to excite and add spice to a married couple’s “sexcapades” is not the secret fantasy of many bisexual woman. There’s a reason why that unattached, willing third-party is referred to as a unicorn.

The truth is, most women are not likely to just jump in the sack with any stranger, let alone two of them at once. Most bisexual women prefer to develop at least a friendship with another woman before reaching the comfort level to pursue a sexual intrigue.

There’s a name for women that jump into bed with two strangers, and it’s not Bisexual…it’s Prostitute. If that’s all you want, cut out the time wasted placing personal ads and the issues you will raise with other Bi women. Go to that street corner most towns have, or pick up the phone and make a deal with a sex professional.

Making the transition from the shared bedroom fantasy to the real-life version of a threesome is a lunar leap. When you involve another woman in your sex play, the maturity level of your own relationship is tested. If you have trust issues or are unable to separate sex from love, it may be best to leave the threesome in the fantasy world of your minds.

The horror stories you’ve heard, where the whole experience was a bust and how the relationship completely unraveled as a result of the threesome, stem from pre-existing underlying problems in the couple’s relationship. If you have unresolved issues in your relationship, you had better tend to those first, instead of embarking on a threesome. (You’d have better luck trying to save the relationship by having a baby – we all know that works like a charm!)

In a real threesome, you have to stretch, grow, let go of a lot of inhibitions, learned attitudes and beliefs and allow your man to not only lust after another woman, but come to orgasm because of her in front of you. If you (or he) can’t handle that, take your ball and go home now. This is not for the faint of heart. This is for big girls.

Once you feel certain your relationship can handle a threesome, remember that the other woman is a person, too! She’s not a “present” to your husband or an “accessory” to your sex play time. Her feelings should always be considered, of course. She has the least to gain and the most to lose.

Realistically, what does she have to gain by making herself vulnerable to becoming attached to a married couple, both of whom are already committed to each other, first and foremost? At best, she can hope to be number two. Now how many of us yearn for attaining the number two position in a relationship? Isn’t number one were we want to be?

Frankly, it’s very creepy to approach another woman at the start of a relationship on the premise of sleeping with your man. She’s interested in YOU. Most bisexual women want to sleep with another woman – not have a threesome. I know you don’t want to hear this, but save the talk about the threesome for later – MUCH later! Think about how you would feel, if it were you.

Inexperienced bisexual women are usually not ready to embrace the psychological impact of a threesome. Experienced bisexual women can tell if you are genuinely interested in developing a relationship, or just trolling for someone to spice up your own sex life.

The real question is this: are you actually interested in developing a relationship with another woman, regardless of whether it develops into the fantastical “threesome” of your imagination? Or, are you just wanting to find a girl to make your man happy?

Your best strategy is to first find a girlfriend for you. Develop a relationship and get to know each other personally, psychologically and sexually, if it gets that far. Until you’ve developed a relationship, it’s really inappropriate to put pressure on her to be interested in your man.

The attraction to your man may or may not materialize. Be realistic about your expectations and most of all, remember to treat others with dignity and respect. Don’t fall prey to the mythical thinking that because she’s bisexual, she’s a bed hopper and treats sexual escapades lightly.

If all you want is a gift for your man, you’re better off buying one.

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Source by Rachel Wells